Sounds more like a mandate. Jury Duty is the only right we have as American's that we are forced to utilize. The goverment wants you to not vote, and they don't really care if you own property until the real estate market goes down the shitter. I think it's absolutely retarded that our country decided it HAS to take the most ignorant people willing and able to sacrifice a day of work (or doing nothing) for $60 to sit and listen to two different arguments of the same tale to determine who was more correct based on the law.
I'm sorry, aren't LAWYERS or JUDGES most qualified for that task?!
I don't want to serve on a jury. I don't. I also don't think I'm most qualified. Supposedly I'm the foremost authority to determine what is most accurate according to the law, and my knowledge of the law is based almost entirely on the television shows Law & Order, The Wire, and the movie Liar, Liar. I'm pretty sure a judge needs to go to law school, acquire a degree, pass the bar, and have many years of experience before becoming a judge. Having 12 Crime Scene Investigation trivia wiz's probably still isnt as knowledgable as a single judge. I mean, who else should be judging these cases. I don't know, probably a judge. Whoever came up with this portion of our laws was a moron. Unless it was Thomas Jefferson. Thomas Jefferson was awesome, and if it was him in this case I'd give him a mulligan.
I get it. It's the illusion of power, the illusion of a democracy - a government run by the people. It's not. Get over it. Stop making us come to jury duty. The only ones that WANT to serve for jury duty are senior citizens (go fucking figure, right) and people who are deadbeats and don't have jobs, and need money for drugs. Even deadbeats without jobs know they have better places to be, but if you need crack, Jury Duty is probably the easiest way to score yourself an 8-ball.
Every time I've been to serve on a Jury I look around the room and notice EVERYONE has the same look on their face as I do. It's the "Jesus fucking christ I need to find a way out of this" look. All you are looking for is an "in" to get dismissed. I was dismissed once for saying I was a "skeptic", and most of the case was based on heresay anyway, so I took that and ran. I had a 10 minute discussion with the plaintiff's lawyer about "how am I supposed to make an educated decision on whether your illegal immigrant of a client actually tripped and fell in the illegal immigrant illegal operation employers truck full of oils and paints?" The judge had to bring me in and eventually dismissed me, but it was close. I was clinging to anything. Success.
One sure fire way to give a whirl is to say that your close relative is currently involved in a similar case and you have been subpoena'd as a witness. Laywers hate that. At the same time, I'm pretty sure you are in contempt of court if you outright lie about something. So yeah, don't do that. You need to look out for every single "out" you might have, and jump on that shit.
I just don't trust the field of citizens as much as I trust trained professionals in the art of law. I certainly don't trust me. I would Pauly Shore that shit like it was the actual movie Jury Duty (in the event I got badass shit like Pauly Shore did in the actual movie Jury Duty).
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