REVIEW: Valentine's Day

BuDaChick apparently recorded this movie a few weeks ago on HBO, and this morning she hit the play button.  I was in the vicinity.

This movie is one of those chick-flick ensembles, where they basically put everyone and anyone in a movie and see what happens.  Not just regular actors, like headliners.  You know, so it's distracting.

George Lopez plays the role of an extra, or a guest starring role for his 30 seconds of borderline coherent film.  Queen Latifah plays the role of the boss of one of the main-er characters.

In a nutshell, this movie was AWESOME!


Not so much.  It just felt funny to say that.  This movie really wasn't good, but was entertaining enough that I didn't say "turn this shit off", so that's saying something.

Jessica Alba was pretty bad.  I mean, she's just not a good actress.  She's hot, no doubt, but she's not, er, smart.  The movie starts with her being proposed to by the Kootch, and she says "wow" like any terrible actress would.

Just take a look at the IMDb page for this movie, there are way too many actresses in this damn movie.  Like most movies of the kind, because you don't have time to delve deeper into characters than the four scenes allotted will allow, that's exactly what you get.  Mundane trivial scenes and character development.  Guy likes girl, guy gets hurt, guy realizes he likes other girl based on friendly relationship they've had but don't have the time or writing talent to get into during this particular movie.  It still doesn't make sense to me why Jamie Foxx is in this movie, his acting wasn't terrible, but the writing for him was.  I also don't understand how he and Jessica Biel got together.  Maybe I wasn't paying attention during that short, well-written scene.

Finally, whoever wrote the movie, and whoever directed it, how would you think it would be fine to have a 5th grader running around L.A. after dark talking to some guy who owns a flower store and trying to find his teacher on Valentine's Day.  I also don't understand the significance of Eric Dane's character being gay - I distinctly remember looking up from whatever it was I was doing and wondering why he said that during a press conference.  Anne Hathaway still looked hot in the movie.

I'm out.