The possible answers (for a CNN poll) are "A Lot", "A Little", and "None". I'm a big fan of polls. I like to see what the United Stupid of America are thinking (or rather, not thinking about) - United Stupid of America is a Bill Maher term, not an original BuDa-ism, I wish!
I submit these events, or transgressions, or whatever the fuck you want to call them, will not hurt Tiger Woods image in any way shape or form.
Reason #1
This dude is everywhere, and marketable as hell. His name is TIGER for god sakes! He's made millions marketing shit, and hasn't once been forced to be linked to any type of actual tiger: bengal or Tony. He's a gold mine for anyone who can get their hands on them. I have an entire section devoted to "Golf", and just a heads up, not a single one deals with Steve Stricker. Seriously, who the fuck cares about Steve Stricker - but he did make the 2nd most money in this past years events...
Reason #2
There are only three (3) types of stories that the American media like to report about.
(A) Scandal - no doubt, you have to be famous to have some sort of a scandal, but they eat it up. If you've gone from having 99.9% of your career media being presented through sports outlets, and then you are "Tiger-Watch" on TMZ and BuDaMoM says to her son, "Let me flip on The Insider to see what's going on with this Tiger...", you know you've reached the 'Scandal' threshold.
(B) Tragic Downfalls - Lindsay Lohan is a pro at this shit, and she's been in a downward spiral since Mean Girls. Tiger Woods hasn't reached this level yet, but who knows, the entire Florida Highway Patrol (every last man, woman and child on the payroll) spent about 4 and a half days to issue a whopping $164 summons to Mister Woods, you never know what the fuck is going to happen next - seriously, it's akin to the Coast Guard taking the entire weekend to try to find John F. Kennedy Jr. in the fucking ocean. Waste of taxpayers dollars and preferrential treatment, fuck that. Finally...
(C) Don't Call It a Comeback - there is nothing the American people love to do more than to take someone down a peg or ninety, but we're also incredibly fickle, and we have short attention spans. Forgive AND forget?! Why the fuck not. I can't remember what my daughter's birthday is, I suppose I can get over your drug addiction Robert Downey Jr. American's love to jump into celebrities business that isn't theirs to make themselves feel slightly better, so when those same celebrities overcome some sort of adversity, American's also like to get in on that love that they had no part in creating. It's the wondrous circle of fame.
Reason #3
It's just not a big fucking deal. If he was banging other broads, he and his wife will get divorced or they won't. If he wasn't banging other broads, they'll stay together. Either way, this dude is going to be the most famous golfer in the world for so many years to come. Remember "The Shark" Greg Norman? That dudes hats barely sell. Tiger Woods is the only reason that white-country-club-wives walk into the clubhouse barroom to see what is happening with the PGA, to ask "What's Tiger doing?!", and to pretend that they have some sort of diversity in their lives. With the white-country-club-wives on his side, Tiger will also have success.
Tiger Woods will remain a fantastic golfer, and he will remain a "celebrity" that advertisers want to pursue to have him represent their products. At the end of the day, any press is good press, and this kind of "story" shouldn't have any effect on his professional career - unless he didn't get a prenup. You know what Kanye says, it's somethin' that you need to have cuz if she leave yo ass she gon' leave wit' half...
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